#Trust30: Day 3 Post

“One Strong Belief” Prompt: The world is powered by passionate people, powerful ideas, and fearless action. What’s one strong belief you possess that isn’t shared by your closest friends or family? What inspires this belief, and what have you done to actively live it?


In the fall of 2001, I packed up my life and my stuff (basically furniture and 40 boxes of books) and moved 2000 miles to Los Angeles, where I had no family, one acquaintance, and had just gotten a job.  I’m sure a lot of people at the time wondered why the hell I was doing such a thing.  People are still sometimes visibly surprised to learn that I moved out here without any kind of already existing support network.

Call it my first mid-life crisis.  My mom had died, my cat had died, there was political turmoil at my workplace, and I had just turned 35.  And I came to the conclusion that even though chance had set me down at birth in a small town in Ohio, that didn’t mean that I had to live my whole life in that part of the world if I didn’t want to.  The various changes in my life just acted as a springboard to get me going.

I’ve been here now for 10 years.   I always bought into the view of Americans being such a peripatetic population, but from the reactions of a couple of my friends and family members then and even now, I wonder about that.  They look at me like I might as well have moved to the moon. It’s just as odd and as far, in their opinion.  And me?  I’m a midwesterner through and through, *and* I love living in Southern California.  I’m glad I did what I did 10 years ago.

Learn about #trust30 here.

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Wearing Her Perfume

Ciara 100#

image from perfume.com

Today I’m wearing Ciara, which was my mother’s perfume.  Ciara is (or was) made by Charles Revson.  It’s still produced, although the bottle I have is literally the one from my mother’s vanity.  The Internets say it’s a Revlon production now (and I was always a little confused about the Revson/Revlon connection, if there was one.)

I have the 100 proof version.  Or the 100% version.  It’s the medium strength version of Ciara, which never carried the perfume/eau de parfum/eau de toilette delineations, but rather 200%, 100%, 80%.

This bottle is one of the things my dad gave me shortly after mother died.  So yes, this is some heavy-duty stuff I’m wearing. Physically, the juice is over 10 years old, but it smells just as I remember it.  It’s a strong, sweet oriental.  The sweetness decays a bit after it’s been on my skin for a while, like fruit that is rotting.  Makes it more interesting, in my opinion.

I never wore it when mother was alive — because that was her scent, because it was a little too sweet for me, because it was *hers*.   She and I also did a little dance around each other as we decided which Chanels were right for ourselves.  I started with no. 22 (a little too tickly in the nose and white flower-y at the time for me) and moved to no. 5;  she did the reverse.  The tickly white flowers smelled great on her.  So Ciara and Chanel no. 22 were hers. They still are.

This perfume that I’m wearing will never be *mine*, but sometimes I need to wear it. It’s the closest I can get to smelling it on *her* skin.

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Today (#Trust30)

I have been anxious lately, and today is a day for being aware and gentle to myself.


Learn about #trust30 here.

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15 Minutes (#Trust30)

Day 1 of the Trust30 Challenge
You just discovered you have fifteen minutes to live.

I have 15 minutes left to live?  I’d curse, because, who’s fooling who, I’d curse. Then I’d spray myself with a beautiful perfume, brush my hair, and make sure I was wearing clean underwear.  I’d call my brother, my best friend, my boyfriend. I don’t know that I’d discuss what is happening to me.  And then I’d listen to some tunes – something Pete Townshend-y would be appropriate.  I might even dance.

I see from this that I hope my dying will be done in private/alone, and that art and music will always be indispensable to me. At this stage in my life (45 yo), I do not have any overriding words of wisdom for anyone, and I don’t want to bullshit myself that I do.

Learn about #trust30 here.

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Attrape Coeur

Got a little decant of Attrape Coeur and am wearing some today.  I smell like somebody poured vanilla caramel on my head and then put a little candied violet on top.

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